P O S computer

I need to bitch about this more, my friends, roomates and boyfriend are tired of my rants so I'm turning to my blog.

My laptop is the biggest piece of shit in the world. I bought it four years ago... I thought I would be really cool by getting the 17 inch monitor. Yes I am an idiot. Taking it to class and unloading the beast out of my backpack usually takes several painful minutes as I situate and re-situate my power cord, notebooks, and try to tuck in my elbows so the bitch next to me doesn't get an unintentional shot in the tits. I'll let you imagine how much worse this gets on super cramped planes and duirng airport security checks, when the good looking, funny, and kind TSA agents force you to put your laptop in a separate bin. (If you didn't catch the sarcasm, I HATE TSA but we can save that rant for my future travels)

After two years of painfully slow internet my battery shit out completely, if ever unplugged for more than a few moments all 17 inches shut down and lost anything I had been working on. Awesome. Not wanting to waste anymore of my hard earned money on this pile of shit I refuse to purchase a new battery which supposedly would eliminate the problem entirely. Now I am stubborn cheap idiot (no I am not Jewish).

Piece de resistance of my computer woes.... a few weeks ago I must have an had unprotected cyber surfing session or perhaps I unwisely gave my e-mail to a shifty website, the result: I contracted a virus which left me with the "blue screen of death". Fuck my life. I'm in college in the 21st century without a laptop... that's the equivalent of being downtown without pants or up shits creek with no paddle, but worse! What I am supposed to do? Sneak into empty computer labs hoping a class wont barge in on me while I am trying to update my social media or looking at one of the obscure websites I often frequent? My mom suggested library... Does she know who goes there! It's chock full of dorks, Asians, stale books, and apparently women who would rather spend money on cigs than pants for her son. No thanks.

Luckily my boyfriend is somewhat computer savvy and was able to wipe the hard drive and install Windows 7.... only problem aside from losing ALL of my assignments, pictures and music...as well as an extensive recipe collection....My computer is too old to handle Windows 7! It works intermittently, sometimes taking up to 15 minutes just to be in a working state. This morning it literally took me four minutes to open the internet and log into my email. Four minutes!!!! Time yourself next time you do that same task, then tell me if I am overreacting. I'm not.

Recently I have been plagued my flickering black screens, the inability to open most attachments and an often non responsive Firefox (I swear to god I am going to burn my put all of my forks in the garbage disposal and grind them to shrapnel if I have see the "Well, this is embarrassing" window again.

Even now as I am working on my blog my computer is practically giving my lap second degree burns and it sounds like a little creature is trapped inside, probably ripping apart wires laughing at me. I named my computer Grief but God willing this hunk of shit will last four to ten more weeks, then it's a shiny beautiful mac book pro for me. I'm glad I got this off my chest.


Fun Fact Per Post: I am a senior in college

Smoker Lady in the Library

I have a test at 9 am tomorrow, I havent really studied at all for it, but that's not the point. This evening I went to meet a friend at the library to exchange some notes. I sat down at one of the quick use computers to look up a book I needed for a class. As I was waiting some crack head lady with flaming red hair began talking to her son, loudly. She was headed outside for a smoke, leaving her son, who looked about six, alone with her stuff at 9:30 at night. The loudness of her voice startled me and as I looked up to see who was violating rule number one of library usage I locked eyes with the red haired perp.
She then proceeded to talk to me for what felt like 30 minutes about very personal topics. Such as her son sucking his fingers, then his clothes, she's a single mom, how she didn't hardly have any money and she only owned three pairs of pants, she said that she can't let her son suck on his T-shirts because then CPS will come after her. I was stuck in that awkward position where I didn't want to be rude and ignore this person who is talking to me about things that are none of my business but at the same time if I gave her any attention she took this as a green light to continue talking. Finally she left to have her smoke...which made me think...how much are packs of cigarette's these days? I bet if she quit smoking she could probably afford more pants for her son... and aren't little kids supposed to be in bed early? Someone might think I am rude for saying these things and that this woman probably just got dealt a shitty hand in life, which may be true but I think there is a lot to be said about a mother who openly admits to a complete stranger she cannot afford more than three pairs of pants but she has no problem leaving her son alone to go light up. I feel sorry for that little boy.
Which leads me to my self revealing fact of the post: I do not smoke and I do not have children... yet.

Leaving the Dock

Okay, I have decided I am going to begin blogging, which knowing me will probably just be a collection of off color stories, complaints about my life and the world, and maybe some offensive opinions of mine which are unreasonable and completely biased, but hopefully it will amount into something more. I would like to one day polish this up and actaully have a theme of sorts.

I hope to one day accumulate a comment or two on this, maybe even a small number of kooky followers but I have abso-fucking-lutely NO interest in sharing my real name with the blogging community, at this time anyway. Also I am often politically incorrect, inappropriate, and foul mouthed, parts of my true identity I don't wish to share with potential employers, family and friends, or anyone who would look at me odd if they knew about this. I am, however going to share one small fact about myself per post....

Usually I reach for the Bombay, but tonight I will be sipping Stoli.